sidekick vs psychic

One of my dearest friends in this whole world took me on an adventure in the boonies of Oregon. I have to say, since it was on the west side of the mountains, at least they were pretty boonies and not all dried up. I mean, dried up has its pretty moments, but as someone who grew up in a desert, I really do appreciate the green. This picture was taken in February.

Peeks took me to see her brother and his family. They were warm and generous and fed me yummy dinner. It was also quite entertaining, as they have six kids under nine years old. It took me a few minutes just to be able to sort out their names. One of the little boys obviously had a crush on me. Haha. I remember those days.

Anyway. My friendship with Peeks has taught me something that I knew in my heart, but that I had never consciously realized. When you love someone fully, you love all parts of them. I don't mean that you love everything they do, or that you are happy all the time. What I mean is that to love someone, to really let them in, is a choice, and you have to choose to put all your chips in the pot. No ante-ing up anymore. Go big, or go home. No reservations.

I've never met anyone like Peeks. She draws people to her. I've never met anybody who didn't like her. She's fun and fun-loving. She's generous and kind. She is concerned about how other people feel, and goes out of her way to make people comfortable. She's insightful and curious, and loves adventures and to make people laugh. She's had a lot of hard things happen to her in her life, and a lot of challenges, but she can almost always find something to laugh about. She's a great listener. When she's with you, she's really with you. She's not playing on her phone, or thinking about something else, or wishing she was somewhere else. She gets wrapped up in the moment and totally loses track of time. This is wonderful when you are the person she's with. When you're the person who's next in line for her attention, it's not always so easy to love that quality about her, and one time, when I was in that position -- the position of being Next on her list, I got really frustrated because I felt like I really needed her and she was putting someone else first. For hours. And I needed her! I needed her badly. I was out of joint for awhile, but then, as I was waiting, and waiting, and what felt like waiting more, I realized that she had been there for me many, many times. And probably, for some of those times, someone else was waiting for her, like I was waiting for her at that moment. And that probably other people had been frustrated because I literally hogged all her time.

In that moment of frustration and irritation, I told myself, "you love her. You love this dear Peeks of yours. Yes, you're upset about this. Yes, you wish she would just get here already. But think about how often she has been there for you, when you needed it most; listened to you, when her back was aching; taken time to love you when she probably really would have rather been in bed." And that's when I realized that I could be mad, or I could be loving. If I was going to really love her, I needed to love that quality about her, and accept that she wasn't always going to be there at exactly the time when I wanted her, because she was probably off helping some other person feel good about themselves. I needed to appreciate her for her ability to heal people. In short, I needed to love her wholeheartedly in spite of this one attribute that was so beautiful when I had access to it, but was so annoying when I wanted it and couldn't have immediate gratification, even if we had planned for me to have gratification at a certain time and location, and the agreed upon time had passed.

Once I accepted this, I felt lots better. I was more patient. I tried to consider all the other people that she was helping, who needed her, whether they realized it in the moment or not. Because she's a beautiful person, inside and out. She cares and loves with everything that's in her. I decided I wanted to be more like her in that way -- the way of truly looking outside yourself and listening closely.

Peeks and I are kindred spirits. I tell people I'm her sidekick. Apparently I need to learn to enunciate, because people always think I'm saying, "I'm PK's psychic" instead of "I'm PK's sidekick."  We were fast friends from almost the moment that we met...we had an instant bond. She helped me through a lot of things I was going through, without being judgmental. She listened, and she loved. (With me, those two often go hand in hand.)

Loving fully isn't always easy. But I've learned that sometimes you just choose to love someone, and then when your choice is made, you stick with it, no matter what, even when things aren't always easy. As long as you know they love you back and they'll be there for you when you really, really need them, people's true love can see you through ups and downs in relationships.

Love is a beautiful thing. It's a choice. It's a blessing. It is real, and it is a gift. It's not always easy, but practicing real love - love that is kind, unfeigned, unsarcastic, and true - is one of the most satisfying things you can choose to partake of. I knew this about family members, and other people in my life, but I never really realized how much of it was up to me until I met Peeks. So thank you, lovely lady, for showing me one more way to have happiness in my life.